Mr Nobody in reality

I just realized the moment which was a big big crossroad in my life and where one decision in my life affected it in more ways than I could imagine.
It was some years ago, when I applied for EVS for the first time. I wanted to go to work with children in Italy in a place called Bari. I nearly got there but on the last minute I was told another girl was chosen for the project.
I would have gone to Italy in July 2009, the month where I had my first camp with people with learning disabilities. The camp, which had such an influence on me that I decided to volunteer in some other places and had the first idea of going to Maarja küla. If I had been in Italy at that time, I wouldn't have had that camp, I wouldn't had gone to the village, I wouldn't had met G, who changed my view on life in many ways, opened my eyes about lots of things and became my best friend. I would have never met Judith who has become a great friend of mine, all the other people in the village, would probably never have become such good friends with one of my classmates (Teele, yes, I'm talking about you), Kirke wouldn't have been my apartement mate and wouldn't have gotten to know my friends the way I knew them (probably), wouldn't have met people in Italian youth exchange and changed their lives. Two of my brilliant friends wouldn't have been introduced more closely to each other (because I was the one who introduced them) and they wouldn't probably have become a couple that they have been for about 2 years already (yes, Kerttu and Karl, I'm talking about you now).I would have never had the chance to apply for the EVS again and come to England. I would have probably never met so many so amazing people who, mostly, have turned me into who I am right now.
I would be a completely different person, maybe working with children or organizing youth projects or whatever... I know I would be a completely different person.
I started to imagine myself as this other person and I'm happy I didn't get the positive answer from Italy.  Imagining my life as it is described in the movie "Mr Nobody". Different timelines. Wow, this feeling right now is powerful. This tiny decision didn't change only my life..... A bit like a butterfly effect in some ways as well.
Things happen, when they are supposed to happen. I now believe in it. When there's something happening in your life (even if it's a tiny event or decision and it doesn't seem to be fair at the time), it is always good for something. You might understand it after a while (as time goes by), like I just did.
Now I understand why they say that there is something good in something bad.

Such a tiny decision, not controlled by me - and look where I am right now! Or where I could be if I had gone to Italy......
Successful, I'm sure, in both lives, but I think I'd rather have this one. Or, it's not the right way to say it.... I can't say it because if I had gone to Italy I wouldn't have known the other way- the life I have now. The life I absolutely love, with the deepest passion a person can have!
It's such a deep emotion that scares the hell out of me.....

That's Mr  Nobody in reality. In my life.

PS: I know there are many very important decisions in my life I've made, that have changed everything completely.Going to my high school could be counted as the most important decision as well. But, this was not a concrete moment in time, it was just a thought in the beginning and then developed and it was a decision I made in 3 years when I was 12-15 years old. But....  The Italian moment is more spectacular, because it's a tiny decision, not even under my own control, that changed so much. That milestone in my life was just so tiny step at that time but a big step for the whole life (Like "a small step for a human, but a big one for the humankind". - Louis Armstrong). I can't explain in words properly, how the fail of the first EVS attempt was the biggest change in my life, but I definetely know now, it was.

PS2: Another mystery solved- I have thought for a long time what could be the most important moment in my life and now it just appeared to me. Out of nowhere. Like the idea for my eye-tattoo (a simple drawing on my body which has a very important meaning to me as well).

And I believe in such visions, as one could call them. They are powerful. And they have to be right when they just appear to me the ways they do.